Having got back from my holiday, I have to admit, it was hard not to return to a diet. When I was forcing myself into my normally well-fitting jeans on New Year's Day in Tunisia, boy, was it a low moment.
If you think Madonna is bad for the old camel's foot, you should have witnessed me, so tight-fitting were my previously very sexy cropped designer denims. Or maybe not, you might have expected me to carry you through the Sahara Desert (clearly because I'd been eating too much dessert).
While I was on holiday, I seriously had to remind myself what I started all this for, because I was feeling very despondent about the whole thing. Mainly, as I'd put on so much weight, I was blaming the lack of diet and restriction, rather than the lack of paying attention.
But then I figured maybe if I just started paying a little bit more attention to things again, it will all be okay. It got better.
I started tuning in to eating smaller portions again, since I was stopping when I was satisfied. I began to really think about what I wanted to eat, and pushed away anything that wasn't extremely tasty (handy that we had a buffet service for our meals). I practiced more positive self-talk and began to rationalise the temptation to diet (what would it achieve in the long, long term?).
By the time I got back, the major panic was over and my jeans were feeling much more comfortable - so much so that I wore them on the flight home (what an achievement from New Year's Day, where I could hardly sit down in them).
I'm still on my second belt notch (I have a system since I no longer own scales - it can be read about in this post) and on the first few days of th holiday, it was fastening on the first notch! While I won't be happy until I've reached the third - my OK zone - I'm happy to give myself time. After all, I enjoyed the festivities, and I don't have to punish myself for doing so.